I had always imagined my life with older sisters to guide me in the ways of navigating different types of relationships whether it be with friends or romantic partners. I even imagined having sisters closer in age to me or as many as sisters imaginable as opposed to the two that I have already been blessed with.
Growing up, my first sister, soon to be 15, and I almost constantly fought with one another over being a snitch and the space and cleanliness of our shared bedroom. Now that we are more mature in age, we giggle about times we were conflicted with one another. However, that doesn’t disregard the fact that sometimes we do still argue with one another like sisters normally do.
My other sister, on the other hand, is fifteen years younger than I. Apart from my other baby brother, she is the second baby I have raised and always will be. The relationship between her and I is much different from my other sister. It has more of a mother-daughter relationship a majority of the time rather than a sister-to-sister relationship that we should have. Regardless, I still have memorable sister-type moments with her despite the huge age gap between us.
Anyway, I wanted to write this open and short letter (or more like blog post) to my younger sisters, as advice to them as they grow into the women they are becoming and the relationships they will have with others.
To my little sisters,
Be mindful of who you share your heart with, whether it be romantically or platonically, for there is only so much of your heart to give. As a person with a heart too big, I’ve gone through the troubles of sharing my generosity with one too many people and having to pay the price. However, just because you need to be mindful of who you share your heart with, that does not mean to live life selfishly. Instead, always live selflessly, while being considerate of others.
When you desire to love another person, remind yourself that love is not meant to be painful, and it shouldn’t be, and never let any one person make you feel less than you really are because only you know what is true.
Through the many friendships I know you will have, remember to always and only be yourself. Don’t change anything about you for anyone. Sometimes, some friendships will not work out because of many reasons like growing apart, moving on, or conflicting problems. I want you to know that that is okay because some friendships aren’t meant to work out anyway. But, that doesn’t mean you should resent those friends and their existence and talk a substantiating amount of trash about them regardless of how bad of a person they were in the end. Instead, treasure the times and memories that were had with them and know that maybe it was for the best.
To the many people who will express negative thoughts about you that aren’t true, I say, forget about them. Know that you are beautiful inside and out and so much more. Don’t get yourself all caught up in the drama because you don’t need that bad energy in your life. It isn’t worth your time to meddle or dwell on stuff like that.
Finally, to the relationship you will have with yourself, put it first before anything or anyone else. Know that you matter, and you matter a lot so show yourself as much love and care and positivity as you can imagine. Only you know what you want in life, therefore only you can think and speak for yourself.
Though there were many other things I wanted to add, I end my note here.
Hope you enjoyed this post. More to come soon.